Really? Can a Girl Catch a Break?

Sunday, July 8, 2007


Let’s have a quick quiz here, peeps.

In the last two weeks I have:
a) had my 7 year old son B-10 confined to a wheelchair because of Perthes.
b) had my car implode and require almost $2000 in repairs.
c) had the man I intended to marry – tell me he wasn’t going to.
d) had the Minister at my church who I look up to the most tender his resignation.
e) all of the above.

If you answered “e” – you win.

Ah, the black humor that surfaces as my coping mechanism. It’s all I can do to hold on. The sense of loss is still so fresh and painful.

I would ask what else could happen, but I have a doctor’s appointment in a week, and I’ve been having enough problems that I’m not sure I want to know “what else”.

I have a daily quiet time, sitting with my Scripture or with my old hymnal singing.

I feel on some level as if I’m having a “Daily Quiet Day”. My heart is in constant prayer, trying to connect with Him and begin to understand His purpose.

Perhaps I should slow down, and just know He’s holding me. I’m going to be okay. I’m going to be more than okay – I will thrive in the life God will give me. The life He is giving me.

It’s so hard to let go and live. The hurt and pain still thrums through me.

I feel lonely. That’s the hardest part. I’m hurting and I can’t go to the person I thought was my best friend. I’m alone.

I trust God.

I do.

Even when it’s hard.

Because if I was only able to do it when it was easy, is it really trust?

May your day be full of beauty and life.

~Lone Butterfly )i(